New Blog

You may have noticed I never post here anymore.  I decided to start a new blog in which I will be adding little crummy doodles to accentuate what I'm saying, plus it will be more organized.
http://raisethegates.tumblr.com/
is the place to find me saying the stupid things I say now!  Go check it out, yo homes!

Experiment

I could whine about depression again, but you've got lives to live and I have better things to say.

So, if you didn't know, I'm looking into going into the sound recording technology major, which is in the music department.  My ideal jobs would be either a music recorder (hopefully one day getting my own studio) or a folie artist.  Anytime you hear a cool sound effect in a movie or TV show, you can thank the folie artist that made and recorded it (and probably edited it too).
Basically sound is going to be very important to me for the next rest of my life (and I have imperfect eardrums.  Am I an idiot?)
So in order to become better acquainted with what will become my most important sense, I'm doing an experiment this memorial day.  I'm going blind.  I'm not sure what I'm going to do, as a simple scarf around my head won't cut it, and duct tape could rip out all my eyelashes, but I'll figure it out.  By going blind for a day, I hope to be able to perceive and recognize sounds and thus be more able to recreate them in a controlled environment (which would be cool as a music recorder and extremely useful as a folie artist).

Obviously, I cannot function perfectly as a blind man.  I have a decent internal compass, so moving about my dorm shouldn't be a problem, but I want to get outside.  Fortunately, my roommate Daniel has agreed to assist me in this endeavor, in that he will keep me from dying.  That's always nice.  Thank you Daniel.

So let's hope this goes well.

Nope

Nope nope nope nope nope so much nope.

That's from a youtube.  Why haven't I updated my youtube recently?  I don't know.  I can't say.  I wanted to practice three hours of organ today but it looks like I'll only get in two, because if I went now it would be fruitless.  I'm unfocused.  I'm unstable.

What?

I put on a hoodie with no shirt for no reason.  Why did I do that?  Why am I this way?  Can I be better?  Sure I can.  Will I be better?  Maybe... I don't know


Oh carry on my wayward son just came on.  That's probably good.

So much nope.

Awright, das fine

Hey, it's been awhile, hasn't it?  I bet no one reads this post because they've all given up on me being on the internet.  I haven't even done a vlog post recently.  Well at least my comic's been running smoothly lately.  You should go check it out, right?

So what've I been up to... hmmmmm.  Well Spring term is sprung and I'm really liking my classes.  They're, piano, organ, and new testament in case you forgot.  The best, however, is Organ.  Pipe Organs are my favorite instrument and now I'm learning to play them?!?! frickin AWESOME!  I'm putting in 2 hours a day plus class, which is pretty good for me as I've had trouble in the past with practicing things.  Yay Khail!

On a lesser note, the girl I was attracted to decided to (very sweetly and politely) turn me down.  We're still friends, but maaaaaan.  Oh well, I'm really not hurt or nothing like that, just a bit disappointed.  It was last week anyhow.
I also have recently invented a delicious shake.  But it's a SECRET!  Ok, no it's not, because the fact that you read this blog should finally have a reward, so here's my amazing shake recipe:
In a blender, mix up:
5-6 largish scoops of cookies 'n cream ice cream
2 tsp of vanilla extract (imitation ok)
2 tbsp of honey (approximately, I didn't actually measure these)
1 can of Dr. Pepper

Mix until liquid.  It's not the thickest of shakes, but very good.

I'm also planning on tweaking that recipe to make it both tastier and thicker.  Probably more ice cream would help, but I've got a pretty small blender.

As for my "emotional health"  (such a stupid phrase, makes me sound like I'm gonna run off and kill some bros).  Well, ah, I guess I'd say I've been 60% good, maybe 65%, still that's 35% of the time that I feel "off", but I'd only put about 4% of that as actually getting really down on myself.  I think that's pretty good.  Besides, I'm starting to think that being genetically predisposed to be depressed sometimes has given me perspective more than anything.

Darn

I've been doing so well?!  Why am I depressed again?!

It could be the change in location just taking a brief toll... it could be my inability to utter a word around certain female... it could be uncertainty about what my future holds.... it could be an imbalance of nor epinephrin and/or serotonin.

This is not fun

That old feeling

It's the last day before I move to a new dorm with Daniel, and also the day a LOT of the friends I've made go home for Spring/Summer.  For some reason it felt familiar.
Then I realized what it felt like:
I used to camp with some guys from my church every now and then.  We also did week long hiking trips every now and then.  We got to know the best and the worst of each other while on these trips, and we always had adventures.  Campfire smoke became a scent we all adopted (it usually covered our body odor pretty well) and we all hailed the easily boiled meals that we had packed.  Disasters struck every now and then and we all had to move through them, and there were also plenty of amazing and hilarious moments that made everything worth it.  In the end we were worn out, smelly, and full of memories.  We knew that we were going back to a world of comfort and luxury compared to the bush we had shuffled through (And occasionally the swamps).  Even getting into the car was a relief to our strained muscles and we knew a hot shower and a rock-free bed awaited us.
And yet there's was still  that lingering smell of campfire smoke on our clothes, even after we had cleaned ourselves up, as if to remind us that we were by no means to forget the time spent and the adventures had.  We'd all be friends still, but not much could compare.

I'm sort of feeling the same way now as everyone goes on to take on different this 'n that's in their lives now that freshman year is done.... but there will always be this distinct feeling of campfire smoke when I think about the time we had...

Places

Well our college church ward had it's last little get together tonight.  Sad days.  Life I guess.

So.... there's a girl...  It's been quite some time since there's been a girl.  Like... I mean... what do I DO?  A:  Ask her out
I already did that, now what?
A:  Ask her out again if you think she enjoyed herself
Well.... yeah I think she did... and we do talk a good deal I suppose... and get along quite well... But what do I do?
A:  Repeating myself like this is tiring
Sorry
A:  No problem
Any good date ideas?
A:  Uh...  you're on your own for that...
So, I guess I have a crush on someone once again.  That's peculiar.  The good news is that she's staying for spring, and in the same complex as me, so I have many chances to fail at flirting.
Yippee!

Sweet mother of finals!

Man I haven't posted in ages it seems like!  I must've been happy, as this is a whiny blog and I haven't had too much to whine about.  That's kinda nice!
So I guess I'll go back to this blog being a mix of my life and various ideas/philosophies I have.  Recently my life's philosophy is a mix between "go with the flow" and "roll with the punches".  I used to (and still sometimes do) stress out about the small things.  Maybe not on a social level as much, since I'm fairly chill as to my "image" and such.  More so about how good I'm doing at school, with my music, and various other hobbies.  While I still recognize that these aren't things I can just roll with, I'm now of the persuasion that when I mess up, I'll still wake up tomorrow and the world will still be turning (well there's a good 99% chance of that barring my untimely death or the apocalypse).
It's a bit generic, but something nice to live by, and I think it's been doing me a world of good.  Haven't been depressed very often at all lately (spring weather is helping too).

Finals week is upon me next week!  But thank heavens that due to early finals, I only have three and should be done with them by wednesday, and then I'm done with this semester!  Woo!  And spring term is gonna be AWESOME!
Do you know why?  I'll tell you why:
In Spring, one only needs 6 credit hours to be a fulltime student.  So I'm taking a piano class, and organ class, a new testament class and I'll still be working as a prep cook.  So basically Spring is gonna be all about music, food, and Jesus.  Way chill!  Maybe I'll gain the courage to ask certain female out again, cuz she's staying too.
I'm content.

Post

Here's a post.   Tada!

Technically..

I'd rather not meet the girl of my dreams, because I always wake up from dreams and rarely remember much of them anyway.  What good would that be?
I also don't want someone perfect.  I'd feel terribly redundant.
She also won't be the apple of my eye, because that phrase makes no sense to me whatsoever.
We won't share a soul, because we both have one, so if we share, where does the extra one go?  Seems unfair to it...
I wouldn't do everything for her.  I can think of a few things that are either physically impossible or insanely stupid that I would prefer not to do on request.
She wouldn't mean the world to me.  The world is infinitesimal in comparison to the rest of the universe.  I should at least pick a few galaxies or something, though that's still infinitesimal.
I would probably die for her if it came to that, though in all honesty I'd prefer we both stayed alive.
I won't say we have "something special" because love has happened probably billions of times.  Not saying it's not special to us, but to assume it's only us is naive.


I used to be more romantic then this...

I guess I should address that it's now been one full year (a leap year I guess) since my last break up meaning that I've now been stag for a year, which is the longest I've been single since Sophomore year in high school.  I really don't feel any sense of remorse over it any longer (to feel that for a year would be downright pathetic) and I actually had my first real (not encouraged by a third party) date since then yesterday, which went well by the way. 

Still, it's an interesting dynamic to take into account in that a year ago I was feeling essentially obliterated in a way I didn't think COULD wear off, and now only one year of my life later I'm doing just fine.

Life is curious.

Panicing.

So I'm going to panic for a bit here... 

Ehh actually no, I'm not.  I'm keeping entirely calm.  I'm up to date on classes, doing well at work, I don't have a migraine today (they've been plaguing me all week!).  Actually I'm taking steps to reduce the amount of migraines I have, one of them being thatI won't sleep in and also I want to reduce the amount of tine I spend on the computer.  Can't hurt.  Also, I'm trying to eat more regularly instead of the "on-the-fly" vending machine raids.  Gotta keep tha-

ugh, after watching downton abbey, I'm thinking in a British accent.

-t blood sugar level.

I guess the only reason to be even slightly panicked is that my date is on Tuesday.  Apparently I do pretty well with people (lately) but a one-on-one encounter with an attractive female who I toy with the idea of having feelings for is worrisome.

Well 'ere's to luck.  Cheers!

boasting

So, I'm going to brag a bit here.  I have a date next week, tuesday (I know tuesday sounds like a weird time for a date, but it's what worked).  I've gone on a few dates since coming to college, but this one is different!  Because this time I sought it out with the full intent of making an impression.  Well I hope I do anyway.  Also it's realy the first date that I wasn't set up on, egged into, or decided it was a date halfway through the date in... well, a year.
Dang.
I'm realizing that my date is on the 27th... which is one day before the anniversary of my last breakup.  Go figure.  Not saying that this date I'm going on will result in relationship.
And of course I would finally take interest 3 weeks before finals...  I hope she's staying for spring.  Or not, depending on how the date goes :3


On another note, I'm in a downright good mood today.  I've been doing better with spring weather peeking into my life lately, but I would say I'm happy today.  Hooray!

Randomness #9

Good old randomness.  I realize that everything on this blog is random, but in these posts the randomness is  even more quick and in small bursts.

Did I mention my greatest fear is wasps?  Totally wasps.  Bees and bumblebees aren't great either but there's a certain debilitating fear of the sickening hanging legs of the most vile insect upon the face of this earth.  This might stem from the 1.5 inch pitch black wasps that occasionally plagued my yard in summer when I was a kid.  Those.  Were.  Terrifying.

So... I .... might be possibly acknowledging the notion of the possibility for the potential attempt at asking someone out.  Like, for more than just... asking someone out.  I mean, it's very slightly possible.  In that I'm unsure whether there is some sort of "feelings" for her, but I'm also pretty sure that there aren't not feelings. Man, I WOULD think this 3 weeks before finals.

Apple juice is delicious!

Oh crap, I have clean checks today!  And a midterm!  And I'm donating blood!  MAN I'm glad I withdrew from Chemistry.  I would absolutely die today if I hadn't.

I try to give blood a lot.  It's giving without doing much more than laying there... and bleeding.

I realized the other day how downright terrible I am at recycling.  I could do much better at that, though honestly I question just how useful recycling some things are.  I've that recycling paper takes more energy than planting trees, but that might be wrong.

My vlog has been getting better and getting more views!  One of my next posts will include a piano and me not playing it.  Someone will be playing it, but not me.

If I had a million dollars... I'd... pay for school... then... umm... buy a really nice camera and other sorts of recording equipment... then... then I'm not a sure.  I'd buy you a fur coat, but not a real fur coat that's cruel.

I hav never punched someone with serious intent of causing harm.  Ever.

I got offered weed while I was walking on a sidewalk by a bunch of guys in a beat up car, who had stopped at a stoplight.  I turned these entrepreneurs down.

Feelin' pretty good today, 

This

I'm trying this new little outlook on life of "go with the flow" and "roll with the punches".  It's sort of an acceptance of how life is, not always how I'd ideally want it to be. that doesn't mean
I should still try to improve it, but rather I shouldn't dwell too much on howI can't seem to improve it in some ways.

Usually this new view works pretty well, but unfortunately my frickin' turbulent emotions still can't let me be sometimes.  I'm getting better at settling myself down or picking myself up than I used to in Summer and especially Fall, but it's still largely unfun sometimes.

Foo

Now that I've dropped chem, life seems more simple.  Thank you withdraw button!

The times are toughening

Got back from my brother's wedding... ok, missed friday and Monday classes, no big deal right?
Well, I don't know what we added to our dance for tap... hmm
- I missed (yet another) assignment in Chemistry because I missed lectures.  At least we already took the second midterm for that one, which I failed.  Maybe I should withdraw...
- American heritage!  Iusually am alright missing a few lectures there and- what?  Paper due in labs... tomorrow!?!?!?  Hmm, well... I suppose, when I get off class tonight... at 5 (well, I'll be totally ready at 5:30 if I choose to eat, which I probably should).  Oh, and the midterm's next week... wonderful.
- Severe and hazardous weather!  Hey, I got on top and even got my assignment in on time!  Go me, I'm finally on top he- sorry what?  Oh the midterm IS this week.  Well, uh, well... goawayrightnow
- Book of Mormon Class!  I was already behind, but getting a bit caught up.  Yes I realize the midterm's today through friday, thankyouverymuchyouuselessuniversityeducationwhichissofarstressingmemorethaneducatingmewhichseemscounterproductive.
- I always do well in theater class!  Rehearsal friday at 5... well if I do my midterm then, which I should, I probably won't be eating.  Frick.

The reason I  can't do much on Thursday is due to my two normal classes, work, and apparently family services has to look inside my brain to see if I'm good for a mission.  I bet you they tell me I suffer from mild to moderate depression.  I bet they take over an hour to say it though.  I HATE redundancy in conversation.

Maybe if I go mad, I can get out of some of this stuff.

Thought

I was thinking tha-
WOAH NELLY I forgot I have to pack to go home for my brother's wedding!  Maybe next time, guys!

Musicals

Here's a preface to this:  I will probably be leaving for my 2 year mission (wherever it may be) in Summer.  I'm glad to go.
Keep this in mind.

So!  If I had the option to be in any musical, I doubt I could choose just one!  Here's a list of staged musicals I would love to be in!  As well as the character I would like to be (it is tempered by the characters I think I could play.  In other words, I won't put a character that I like if I would make a lousy actor for it).

1. Fiddler on the roof - Perchik.  I could mak a good Perchik (even if I'm pretty sure I'm spelling his name wrong...)
2. Phantom of the Opera - The Phantom.  A kid can dream, I'd be happy with a chorus part here too, though.
3. Wicked - Boq.  Boq was pretty much written for me.
4. Ragtime - Obviously I couldn't play one of the black guys, but I'd make an alright Tateh, given a fake beard
5. Man of La Manch - Sancho.  I'd need a fat suit for it.
6. Les Miserables - Not picky, although if I were a little more intimidating I'd want to be Javert, but I don't think I'd have a chance at that.

If I could be in all these shows, I could die happy (I was already in fiddler on the roof, so that's one!)

Well look at that!  Auditions at BYU for Phantom of the Opera are coming up soon!  When's the performance.
...
January of 2013.
Well.
umm
Ok
That's fine
I
I didn't really want to anyway
Probably wouldn't have gotten in

Yeah

I'm happy to go on my mission

I swear!

...

...
dang, this is a trial

Uh oh, existential ennui is beginning to bloom within me.

HOLD ... IT... OFF!

Maybe I can sleep it off?

I'm gonna ignore the pain in where I can only assume my appendix is.  It's probably nothing.  Ignoring how many times I threw up this morning, though that was probably from the migraine.

Existential crisiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiis, stay away!  I'm ... happy isn't the right word... content with my place in the universe and my relative size!  Go away crushing thoughts!

FACE

I have a face!
-_-
Sleepy face.
        I got a job for Vector Marketing, which means I sell Cutco knives which, as it turns out, are actually very good knives.  Also, it's not telemarketing, which is good.  It's all pre-set demos, which sounds alright to me!  Yeah.

      So I totally had the opportunity to flirt with someone I didn't know and I BLEW IT!  I was at payless shoe source... getting shoes.  And the clerk lady was both attractive and British!  Also, the computer stalled during the purchase which was a wide open chance!  She also said she liked my fedora, not just hat, but she said fedora!
I could have dropped a line!  I don't know any effective lines, but hey I could've dropped a bad one...

(A very strange man gave me a similar comment later the same day, but that's really not related).

       At least I felt the inclination to flirt.  I'm still extremely weirded out by my lack of attraction towards anyone lately.  Well that sounds wrong, I still think women are attractive and I have friends who are of the feminine definition, but I'm completely loveless.  No "crushes" I've had have lasted more than... a week maybe?  A week tops for sure.  I try to convince myself I "like" someone (these all sound like such juvenile phrases, but I suppose they still apply) but that is really not a good idea I think.  What's up with this?  I used to be a totally hopeless romantic!
Bah.
       Maybe I've just not met the "right person".  I know I'm over my last girlfriend, excellent as she was, but heck the anniversary of our break up (actually me getting dumped, but not rudely) is in about a month, so pining over her would be pointless, and I have no reason to.  Not sure why I brought it up.
Maybe I'm just setting some unreachable standard or waiting for some divine message on who I should date?



Meh.

I watched a lot of Phineas and Ferb today.

The more I look

          The more and more I look at it, the more I like how the major of Sound Recording Technology sounds.  I've been researching it for a bit and it seems like the thing for me.  It touches my artistic side with the music classes offered as well as my tech-nerd side with the fancy microphones and the editing that takes place.  I wanted to be a video editor at first, but while I do that with my vlog, I've found that editing the soundtrack is just as much fun, and the program offered here can actually incorporate a little bit of video production/editing...
Sweet!
          Ok... ok, decision time.  Although I probably won't be able to apply until I'm back from my mission, I'm going to seek acceptance into the sound recording technology major.

And yes, I'm over my depression from Friday, don't you all worry.


ALSO, while signing up for classes for spring, I totally just impulsively added a piano and an organ class.  My dream of playing the pipe organ may be realized!!!

A lot of my friends find or have found significant others.
I am happy for them.
I am not happy in general though.
This is a bad weekend so far.

Whyyyyyyyy

       I woke up depressed today.  Unpleasantly depressed.  The kind where you think too much about who you are and why you don't like that.
Blerhg
       I think I'll go to class today.  I don't want the slippery slope (what a political weapon of a term.  friggin' politicians) of missing class and then missing more class and then having too much to get caught up so I don't get caught up and then dropping out and then failing at life and living out of some dumpster.
       That and I really shouldn't have a day to myself until I can get my spirits up a bit.  Being alone really just speeds up a case of the grays.
Which reminds me!  Daniel posed an interesting question on depression and colors, so I made a spectrum.  It does not include all the colors.
So...
GRAY:  Gray is the blahs.  The "life is the same everyday and I'm tired" existential blahs.  I'm pretty gray right now.
BLUE:  Blue is an artistic kind of depression.  This is more experience driven, in my experience.  The "oh she left me" and then you write great music or paint things variety.
BLACK:  Black is bad.  Suicide bad.  If you feel black, you need to find people and be with people.
YELLOW:  But not a sunshine yellow, more of a sickly icky yellow.  Which is what it is.  It's that worn out down feeling you get when you're sick.  blegh.
WHITE: A sort of garish white.  Scrubbed interior of an evil government building white.  This is the "nothing currently feels real" feeling.  Not necessarily depression, but it's weird and unpleasant.  And you can also taste your own tongue and feel the shoe against your foot.

Good enough.  I'm done.

For the record, although I don't hate Valentine's day, seeing a lot of happy couples and their excruciatingly cute FB posts and pictures the next day is PRETTY DANGED PAINFUL!

Allow me to compile my senses

       At this time last year (specifically valentines day) I was delirious with love.  If you feel so inclined you can even look up that post and you'll find it is very discombobulated.  Well, this year I'm pretty single, but I have things to say about the day anyhow.
       Currently, I'm not one of the people who preps nice things and goes on about how he likes the holiday, because there is no reason for me to do those things.  But neither do I go on about how it's one big commercialized whoopdeedoo or that it's "single awareness day" or maybe that you should just show that kind of love all year.  I'll address all those things.
       As for it being a commercialized holiday, what holiday isn't?  The celebratory 24 hours came before the big boxes of chocolates in the store window and the obnoxious cupid advertisements.  And it's entirely up to a person whether or not to indulge in the way-too-colorful gifts that are pretty easy to buy.  And if that's what their partner wants then more power to them.  But one can take the idea of the day and choose give more meaningful things.  For instance, last year all my valentines gifts to my then love were homemade (oh except a flower, that was bought I guess) and they appeared to be very well received.  So I managed to keep the charmingness of the day without becoming a corporate tool!  Go me!
       As for it being "single awareness day" that's just bitterness.  Yeah people are going out a cheesy romantic dates and getting things and probably ...  anyway... and you aren't.  So?  You COULD use valentines day to show love to a justfriends friend or you could entirely ignore it and move on.  Ok, I admit it can be hard to ignore sometimes.  Believe me that I know the fear of dieing alone is strongest on Valentines day when you are single, but that's no reason to ruin someone elses day by touting about the evils of single awareness day to them.  That's just being mean.  Other people currently have the opportunity to have a fine romantic day and why would you want to ruin it by whining at them?  Stiff upper lip, mate!  S'only once a year, don't ya worry!
         Now if you are in a relationship and you're met with the infamous "why not let Valentines Day be all year?  You only love him/her that one day?  Weak" (you probably heard this from someone who believes in "single awareness day").  The reason you don't show the kind of affection expected on V-day is because that would EXHAUST you.  I believe you when you say you love him/her but it doesn't always mean you're infatuated with him/her (because infatuation all the time would be likewise exhausting).  The idea of V-day is to be infatuated with love again.  To be cornily romantic (which really is quite fun) for the day.  I'm not saying you shouldn't only do it once a year, but there's no reason why you should choose specifically not to on V-day.  Why not?  It's already got the societal glue of ritual behind it and there's no shame in that.

Besides.... Presents!!

Aww

I.  am.  doing.  TERRIBLY at this media fast!  Aww!

Although I do now do my homework and a little creative work before netflixing, so it's better than nothing, plus my facebook usage is way down.  Not my netflix usage though :3

When I get a headache, my art gets weird

Here's a song: CLICK ME
Album: Speculative Cobra
Title: Don't trust them
Artist: Khail Ballard
Comments:  I made this song to see if you could actually listen to the whole thing.  It's not long, just pretty painful.

Things are going in a fine manner

         More and more and more and more I feel like I should actively pursue the ancient and forbidden art of dating.  I don't exactly know what's holding me back.  Well, I suppose a part of it is insecurities, but I think I'm very slowly getting over/used to them.  I guess another reason is I'm not attracted to anyone in particular (a few options, but nothing solid) and that's been the driving factor in my seeking dates in the past.  But the hopeless romantic in me is telling me to really start looking again.  It's tried this before, but I haven't felt willing until just recently.  Maybe it's because all my friends are dating a lot... hmmm

(My "e" key isn't working very well, it's annoying me)

        So the partial media fast has been doing alright.  Giving myself concessions is proving a profitable or risky business, since I do in fact get in my hour of homework and two hours of creativity to get an episode of Netflix in, but the temptation to keep watching it is strong.

OK 2.0, here we ... set forth

okokokokokok

I need to do another media fast.  Quite badly, in fact!  And thusly, starting on Monday, I will!  For two weeks again.  The parameters will be a little different this time.  A little nicer, because I'm kind of a wimp.
So here they are!

-30 minutes onFB a day TOPS
-Only read updated comics, no going through the archive
-Video games and Netflix can be played pr watched socially or after doing two hours of "creative time" (drawing comics, making vlog posts, or composing) and one hour of homework (or more if needed, just none BEFORE homework).  Also, try to limit to 2 show on Netflix, tops.
-Only updated YouTube videos (I follow a couple vlogs...)
-Updating blog(s) is ok.  So is finding content for updating blogs if need be (more on that later)

Well that seems doable!  It will be maintained until February 20th
(I never limit the use of my cell phone because I honestly don't use it that much)

Media fast 2.0!  Now I'll be able to focus on my work... which is my sad attempts at making musics.

Shakespearean Accuracy

Who here likes Taylor Swift?  Ok, I see a small raise of hands.  Don't be shy!
That's ok.  I don't have anything against her more than any other country/pop star.  Maybe less even than that.  So you're good, Taylor.

Except for this song:  Love Story.

So Romeo and Juliet eh?  She does an alright synopsis from Juliet's point of view for the first bit of the song.  Yes Juliet WAS quite in love with Romeo; immediately after seeing him by the way.  And the staircase she mentions is probably the balcony scene which is pretty romantic and blah blah blah.

The line about her dad saying "Stay away from Juliet" didn't happen in the play.  Had Juliet's father seen the two of them together at all, there probably would have been blood.  Everywhere.  The Capulets and Montagues were not exactly friendly to each other.

She is accurate in saying the two of them get married (VERY soon after meeting, by the way) by a nice impartial friar (poor guy isn't mentioned, though honestly hardly anyone from the play is).

The line "I talked to your dad" didn't happen.  There would have been the blood thing again.

And this is where the song ends!  Full of holes!  BUT WAIT!  I've got more!
Taylor left out the beginning and the end of the play!  Let's take for instance the party where Romeo and Juliet meet:
Romeo is originally depressed because he's so madly in love.... with another girl named Rosaline.  Suddenly he sees Juliet (it's a masked event which is why there isn't any fighting between the two families) and BAM love at first sight!!! Woo

Ms. Swift, does your ideal love story involve the man being pretty whimsical about his love of women?  Hmmm...

Ok, so we got the beginning down and now comes the song.  You can look up the lyrics if you haven't heard it every single night you work like I do (which is why I have it half memorized at this point).  Now onto the end!

I wrote some verses for her song actually...  After when it ends.
It starts with the same tune as when she sings "I got tired of waiting":

Then Romeo slew Tybalt
And got run out of town
The city's in revolt
And you running off was getting me down
and I said


Romeo tell me this isn't how you had it planned
I still love you even with blood on your hands
I went to the friar, he gave me a flower
That'll make it look like I've passed my final hour
he said


(to the tune of "marry me juliet")
What'd you say Juliet?  Romeo missed the entire thing
Thought I was dead and went back on the upswing
He went to my tomb he killed my other suitor
Still thought I was dead and poisoned himself
in a horrid stupor


(To the tune of "we were both young")
I woke up and I saw the situation
how Paris and Romeo had given to aberrations
I felt sad
Things were worse than bad
So I grabbed Romeo's blade
and said goodbye
"Come happy dagger" was my final reply
and I went with my lover to past the end of the road...


(Guitar interlude)


We were first young when I first saw you.


Wow.  This will probably become a vlog post before long.

As a reader and enjoyer of William Shakespeare, I offer these verses to Taylor Swift.

Y'know Romeo and Juliet isn't even a very good love story.  More of a cautionary one.  Just sayin'!

Successes

I haven't posted here in 9 days!  That might be a record for this blog!  Why could this be?
Is it that my class schedule is too busy?  Could it be that I haven't had any deep penetrating thoughts of late?  Have I been too depressed?

Well I'll answer those in order:
A bit
No, of course I have
No no no.

Honestly my depression hasn't really bothered me at all lately.  I mean I'll still get a case of the blahs occasionally, but other than that I've been pretty good.
Also I seem to have inexplicably made new friends.  I'm a biiiiiiit of a shut-in so this is really an interesting happenstance.  They are cool people.

ALSO (and I'm just stating what I heard, not trying to toot my own horn) I heard from a source that the girls dorm hall opposite our own was talking about me in a positive manner last night.  Hmmmm!  Next thing you know I'll have self-esteem! Woo!

As for deep thoughts I was thinking about the mentality of a fan.  (I guess it's not THAT deep, but work with me here)  Like someone who's a fan of something or someone.  I always wonder what drives them?  I mean there are artists and people whom I respect and I enjoy their works, but I would never call myself a die-hard fan of something.  Nothing comes to mind anyway (you may remember me talking about a celebrity crush I had awhile back.  I'd like to point out that it lasted only about 2 weeks.  Tops.)
If I were to meet an artist or actor whom I respected (for example, David Tennant) I don't think I would bask in his presence.  Pretty sure I wouldn't anyway.  They're talented, but they're still people.

But who knows?  Maybe I would be totally overwhelmed and would offer to kiss his feet or something?

Ewwwwwwww

dances Dances DANCES

It's not dances I hate, I've realized.  It's just when they're going on that I dislike.  Cuz during that time, I'm well aware a lot of people are having fun doing dance things and all that and I'm in my dorm.  I also realize that I'm a free individual who could go to the dance, with nothing holding me back.  Except for me.

Because lastly I realize if I go to said dance, I will fricking clam up, not dance, hide during slow songs, and get a little freaked out by the huge close crowd because I have just a touch of agrophobia.

So go dance and have fun, I don't hold it against you.  The only trouble I hold against anyone is myself.

Darnit self!

Stuff and things

Hello!  Been awhile since I've posted, hasn't it?  I say!  Well things haven't been bad, and that's good. Err, that's obvious I guess.
Let me explain my school schedule very basically, though, because it's pretty mad!  I'll just say which hours are occupied because the classes are kind of irrelevant.
Monday!  Class from 9-2 and then another one a 4 (all of these classes are 50 minutes long with 10 minutes passing time.  They are also all in different buildings)
Tuesday!  Class at 9 and then work from 5:30-10ish
Wednesday is the same as Monday...
Thursday Class at 9 and 12, then work at 5:30-10
Fridays have class from 9-11, then one at 1 and one at 4
And that's that.

Now you know when to stalk me you CREEPIES!
Nah, just kidding.  You don't even know where I live.
Do you?

Weekends

I've probably said something to this effect before, but I will repeat myself if that is the case.
Weekends are a pain.

Don't get me wrong, it's nice not having classes and all that jazz, but when you factor in how much I have to scramble to find someone to hang out with or some party to go to or something to freaking DO it's not all that relaxing.  If I don't seek things like that out I end up watching netflix or playing some video game.

Hmm, that reminds me I need to go on another video game fast soon.  Maybe a whole media fast again, looks like the last one didn't take...

So yes, I spent last night watching netflix and yes I got a little bit depressed which is bad because so far I've gone basically the whole term (all two weeks) without really getting down like that.  Saturday looks like it will have a similar effect so far.

Fudge-knuckers.

Yesterday

       Yesterday was a good.  For the first time in quite awhile I acted and was the Khail I always wanted to be, for the evening at least.  I can't help but wonder if I'm able to relax a bit easier now because I'm finally comfortable with being here or if my heavy school and work schedule is just exhausting me to the point that I just don't act shy anymore.  It's a good sign I think either way.
       I also started my workout yesterday, which will be a daily occurrence I hope (minus Sundays).  Any real exercise trainer or coach would be embarrassed watching me do my little reps of simple non-weight exercises (I do it in my dorm, I'm slightly afraid of the gym), but they make me happy, and I think I'll start looking a litte more toned before long (I don't have the body type to ever be "buff").

Woot!

Woah nelly

I love my job nearly all the time, but some times it can give me a very long night.
Tonight at work was the farthest behind that I (or my crew) have ever gotten.  It wasn't mine or their fault, it was just prep work that took longer than expected is all.  I'll admit though, the ensuing panic to clean up and get out at a decent time was the worst I've seen in the prep kitchen.  It even managed to damage the chipper attitude I maintain (quite sincerely, in fact) while I work.  That kind of shocked me, I never get stressed at work (well, overly stressed anyway, there's always a little) to the point it affects my performance or mood.
Not to say it slowed me down, it actually put my cleaning work into overdrive.  Probably scared my coworker (who was a sub for my usual one).  Oops!

No, there's nothing deep about this.  Just happened.  Life happens.
Stay freshish.

Slow down?

It seems like there's been more space between blog posts, hasn't there been?  Go figure, I don't really have much of a reason for it except I've been in a good mood for the most part.  Part of the reason for this is that
I DON'T HAVE A ROOMMATE!!!! YAY


Now, some people would be very sad about this, but I am not.  For one thing, my last roommate was a scuz.  I've really toned that down until now, but a combination of his habits and routines (and the big couch he LEFT in our... MY... already too small dorm.  That was stinging) made me just happy to see him move out.  So I'm happy with single occupancy right now.  Oh yeah, plus I've almost NEVER HAD single occupancy before!  I've got 5 brothers, so for most of my life I've had to share a room (there was a 2 month period where I had my own, but it changed.  Bleah.)  I think this will be a good experience for when I'm a bachelor for the rest of my life.
Haha, no that's just one of the depressing things I say sometimes for fun.  I am not that hopeless!  I just need to meet another girl who's right for me is all.  The social dance class I'm in is promising for being able to meet the people of the gender which has confused even Stephen Hawking.  (Look it up, he called women the greatest mystery).

So I've been playing this old 8-bit game called cave story.  It's fun.
:)
Woops!  I promised I wouldn't put emoticons in my blog because the point of it was not to summarize things as much as text speech does!  Let me do it for real this time...
     o         o
          D
   \_______/

ugh... now I see why emoticons are so popular...

Ohhhhhhhhh my head

This happened last new year too...

I didn't get drunk, as I don't drink, and I went to bed at a little past midnight, which is normal.

And I have awoken feeling entirely hungover.

Man, next year I might just get entirely drunk.  Wait, I'll be on my mission then... right.

Well happy new year, and no it's probably not our last.